When something like this happens, a hashtag flowing all over the world. When it seems like everyone have a story to tell, about something that happen before. Something you wish to share. And you think, ”why didn’t you say something before?”
Well, I know why I didn’t say anything: I didn’t want to be punished at home. And by punished I mean grounded, as in, ”it’s not safe for you to go to the city/concert/cinema on your own/with your friends so you have to stay home”
I didn’t want that. Everything else was so much fun. If someone groped you, touched you, anything that didn’t feel alright you’d talked to your friends about it. You came up with strategies about it. Theses episodes happened as a pre-teen. We learned to handle it. I remember one time me and my friends would sit in Macdonald’s after spending a Saturday shopping (daytime), we’re maybe 10 or 11 years old and this old man had touched our behinds when we were looking thru the vinyls in a department store. We were talking about WHY he would do it. I don’t think we we’re talking about sex back then, just that we thought he was a sick bastard for doing it. None of us mentioned it to our parents. This man lived in the same village as us and I would see him at both my part time jobs during my university years. Always thought he was creepy, but he never did anything again.
It was far worse when it came to family friends who said inapropiate things, looked at you a little too long, hugged you a little too much with hands where hands shouldn’t be. You could feel it was wrong, but how could you tell someone?
When I became older it was a different act. Drunk men – and once or twice women – who were uninvited to: making out, put hands inside pants or shirts, sharing lips and tounges… but I must say, I have put myself in positions where I could have been in trouble but have been lucky enough to meet good people.
I think the times that stick with me is when a no has been interpreted as a maybe yes and things evolved to a even more certain NO making the other part more sure of definitly yes. And at some point talking to your friends isn’t an option and you’re sure you are the one that brought it on, and it’s your fault. Yes, #MeToo